A Cow Story

A COW in a Traffic Jam
(About Pain n agony of a cow trapped in a Traffic Jam)

The other day riding on my bike scrambling through a traffic jam, going past autos overtaking busses n cars I suddenly encountered a cow sitting right in the middle of the road. Yes a cow, so daring that she was sitting right in the middle of Traffic Jam staring people right in their eye n chewing like a baseball player chews while hitting a homerun.

Thinking this I drove to my office n thought if I would be cow, what I will do in a traffic jam, what I will think about these huge busses n trucks. How a cow manages in a traffic jam where there is no place for a cycle to pass through. So I decided to jot down some vague ideas of mine.

Cow’s Perspective

An Intellectual Cow:
It’s a hot day today. I’ve not seen a single piece of grass for the past 3 hours, I don’t know where are those days gone when we ppl use to have huge fields to graze n fall off being tired of eating. Where are those golden days!!!!
Now when I sit in the same old field which existed few years back its always big –big animals around making strange kind of noises, running in all the directions, dunno y r they in such a hurry, is there plenty of food available where they r heading?
Only face familiar is the face of MAN our good old friend. Earlier he use to feed us in lieu of our milk, but now I think he is also falling short of food that’s y he is also running with these animals.

A Casanova Cow:
Yo Man!!
Check it out. There r so many HOT Chicks standing on the other side of the road.
HE -> Hey there!! Whts up, come on over we’ll have fun.
SHE -> I can’t there are so many animals running around they had already hurt some of my friends, I’m afraid to come.
HE -> Yo Babe, don’t be afraid I’m with ya just cross the road n b brave.
(Oh man, she is too afraid; I think this the right time to impress her)
HE -> hey Hottie, check it out, this is the way u should chill out, walk down in the middle n just sit down take a deep breath n cool down.
[Suddenly a truck ran over the Romeo]
HE(taking his last breath) Nxt time Babes.

A Leader Cow:
Leader -> [Walking towards the centre of the road] Good morning, Ladies n Gentlecows. Today we are not here to graze, we are not here to sit down n relax and we are not here to shit. Today we are standing here for a cause, Look at your feet see where u r standing!!
Yes ladies n gentlecows this is the same field where our ancestors use to graze and now look around are you able to see any piece of grass anywhere. No, ppl there is no grass all you can see is these big animals running here n there making strange noises.
Just look at urself see how many of us hav lost their legs, tails, horns and even lives because of these huge animals. This is High Time now that we should raise our voice against them. Lets just stand here in the middle of the road and stop these animal to pass by.


Man’s Perspective
Truck driver:
What the hell I’ve been standing in this Traffic Jam for the past 2 hours. These bloody cattle are not moving an inch. God I wish I have wings n I could fly.
I don’t know what kinda shit this govt. is involved in, Y don’t they take care of these stray animals. They force us to pay huge taxes but provide us with the worst infrastructure available on this bloody planet.

Politician’s Perspective:Secretary -> May I come in Sir!
Minister saab -> Wht the hell, how many times I’ve told ya that don’t disturb when I’m sleeping. Ok, come in u ass****.
Secretary -> Sir, there is a good news for you.
Minister saab -> wht is it ass****
Secretary -> Sir, Union Govt. has confirmed to give us Rs. 5 crore under nationwide stray animals rehabilitation program.
Minister saab -> Ok that’s gud, I was just thinking to arrange some money for my Rolls Royce.
Secretary -> Sir Rolls Royce???
Minister saab -> Yes, I want to gift it to one of my friend on his wedding. Do one thing out of those five use 3 to buy a Rolls Royce phantom and 1.5 crore for make some more petrol Bunks.
Seretary -> But Sir 50 lac is too less for managing these stray animals.
Minister saab -> Abe lallu!! It doesn’t matter even if they are sitting there on roads, If we will take care of them then that’s going to cost us continuously for years. Who’s going to pay for the chara they are going to eat n all. Moreover Stray animals are NOT OUR VOTEBANK so do as I say u ass****.